Thursday, July 27, 2006

When you try to stay away or hide from your own home, then it's not home at all. There are things you can't find where it should be so you end up looking for it somewhere else.

I was struck with the realization that I can blame them all I want for not understanding, but in the end, I share the blame for not understanding them back. I blame myself for hating something I don't think I deserve. I blame myself for being so sick of it. I blame myself for making them think I'm haughty when all I want is to have my own way. I blame myself for deviating from the person they wish me to be. I blame myself for not understanding something I never want to live with. I blame myself for being misunderstood by the very people who brought me up to be like this. According to them, I am the one to blame.

Thanks a lot for that cold biting reality. I now owe you an apology.

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